The Carper

Get Fit With All Out Performance by Dutch
June 11, 2012, 4:00 pm
Filed under: Workout of the Day

Hey Guys,

So look, we all know, girls treat guys like monkey’s treat branches.  They only let go of one, when they have a firm grasp of another.  Whether you are a bro getting laid left and right, a dude just looking for a relationship, or a guy in a relationship he thinks is going well, you need to make sure your branch is better than the other guy.  With that, The Carper is getting in shape.  We’ve found a rhinoceros of a personal trainer, from All Out Performance, who’s willing to share his daily workouts with us and hence (because The Carper is for the betterment of dude kind) with you.  Because he’s got a lot of love to give and doesn’t want the good guys losing out to dick-bag magee.  You’ve seen it time and time again.  Maybe you’ve even been the guy on the back-burner.  Stick to these workouts and whatever happens, you’ll feel awesome about yourself which will give you the confidence to overcome anything a woman does to you.  So….Without further ado…..Your workout for the day:

5 Rounds

  • 400 meter sprint
  • 15 clap pushups
  • 10 pullups
  • 15 box jumps
  • 10 overhead presses with 95 lb weight

Skill Work

  • 3 sets of 5, deadlift (whatever weight is your max)

Ab Workout

  • 20 leg raises
  • 20 knee to elbows
  • 20 crunches
  • 20 barbell rollouts
  • 20 weighted crunches

Yea, this is a bit advanced.  Just do your best.  In a few weeks, you’ll be able to bang this out, no problemo.


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