According to this, Jason Priestly is the same height as Danny Devito. That’s right, former heartthrob Brandon Walsh stands 5’0″, the very same as Frank Reynolds, who looks like a mutant. Not surprisingly, a Google search returns absolutely no pictures of the two together, which I am sure Priestley has written in a contract somewhere to hide this hideous secret from the viewing public. Also, this:
Filed under: Current Events
Dutch awaiting the disaster that had nothing to do with him
You know, Dutch had a lot of balls taunting a hurricane that was NEVER going to come anywhere close to his home in buttfuck Idaho. Now he’s sipping margaritas and typing on his hot pink Dell while I am sitting here typing by candlelight from my iPhone. Enjoy the sticks, dickhead.
Filed under: Current Events
I gave you my feelings on the impending DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM yesterday, but I had to keep my readers in the loop here. The new name for Hurricane Sandy is “Frankenstorm”. Why “Frankenstorm”, you ask? Because it’s almost Halloween, of course! Plus whatever jerkoff weatherman that coined it thinks it will look great on the poster for the movie that is never going to get made because this fucking storm will consist of nothing but run-of-the-mill rain. Book it.
Filed under: Video
Best line of all time at 16:23
The Carper 